Wednesday 10 October 2012

Just some thoughts from the peanut gallery


So I told a few of you that I would put another blog entry up and well…here it is. I’m sorry it’s taken a while but I’ve been slightly busy lately. When I say slightly I mean REALLY busy…L So again I do apologize. But I have to share with you what God has been doing in my life! Guys God is so awesome! I wish it hadn’t taken me this long to figure it out. Some of the things He’s been proving in my life is His love and His joy. I haven’t felt real joy in the Lord in a very long time. It’s really joy in worship. I mean joy in what He’s doing but joy in worship. But the thing is the enemy gets inside your head and he says, “You don’t deserve His love so what’s the point?” And that’s the thing. I was feeling joyful and excited but then I was going into the thought of I really am not worthy. And that’s when it happened. That’s when it clicked.
“Your love never fails it never gives up it never runs out on me.”
Trust me, if there were anyone to EVER feel like a failure in Christ is would be me. But just having that reassurance that His love doesn’t fail and it never gives up. It doesn’t run out on me! I always say this. It’s a good thing I’m not God because I would have lost patience with me a long time ago and struck me down with fire. I have to tell you all that the feeling of God’s true love in your heart is incomparable to anything you will ever feel. Also what I find funny about God is this. Since I could think a conscious thought I’ve wanted my own theme song. Well God has given it to me. It is called “Forever Reign.” Every. Single. Time God meets with me in worship it is through that song. When it gets to the part
      “You are more You are more than my words will ever say”
my heart leaps in my chest. Then it goes…
    “You are here You are here in Your presence I’m made whole
You are God You are God of all else I’m letting go!”
I pretty much start jumping for joy. I just break and realize that I really need to run to His arms. My teacher today spoke of a phrase this morning and it was simply two words. “Bend me.” And while I’ve been experiencing God’s love and joy, I want God to bend and break me.
      “Break my heart for what breaks Yours…”
I want to be absolutely broken for Christ. If there was one thing I would ask you (if anyone reads this…ever) I would ask that you pray for me; pray for my heart. I want to be broken towards the cause of Christ. I want that joy and that love to break me for the rest of the world. I don’t want to feel apathy towards the cause any longer. I love you all. I hope this was kinda slightly encouraging. And when I say kinda slightly I mean REALLY encouraging ;)
Love,
Abbie 

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