Yad Vashem

There are no words for what I experienced today. There really are not. But seeing as my head is full of words I have to attempt to express them in some way. Today we visited Yad Vashem. For those of you who don't know what that is and are too lazy to Google it, it is the Holocaust museum. BUT it is the Holocaust museum in Jerusalem which kinda strikes a different chord in your heart than maybe the one in DC would. I've never been to the one in DC so I could be completely wrong. But upon entrance to the museum there was a video playing and it was showing the Jewish life before the Nazi occupation. It was joyful and loving and very ALIVE! The way that the architect of this building designed it was like a vice. Once you turn your back on the way of life for the Jews, the building gets progressively more narrow and it makes you feel more and more uncomfortable with every turn of the page of this horror story. And for those of you who know me really well, you know I can't STAND horror stories. This horror story however makes me very very angry. And while there were some tears spilling from my eyes throughout the museum, I can tell you right now my heart was only filled with hatred and anger. Now please oh PLEASE don't EVER think I am trying to justify any of this or justify the men who did this. In fact that is the LAST thing I want to ever do in this entire lifetime. But as I was talking to my friends Jeri and Sheyla, all that hurt and anger began to turn into pity and sorrow and a deep realization of something that scared me nearly to death. Sin is sin. There is no "worse sin." God doesn't play like that. Those aren't the rules in the game of eternity. ANY sin separates us from God. I--in my sin that I commit--am no better than the men who were deceived into killing millions of innocent people. Now again I do not wish to justify these men I only wish to say that the only thing that sets me apart from THEM is that the grace that was extended towards me was extended to those men but I accepted it. It was even extended to Hitler but honestly I think that satan (haha I didn't capitalize his name) had such a hold on him that it didn't even matter anymore. What I actually am trying to get across here is that God loved those men. And it broke His heart to see them commit such sin JUST as it breaks His heart when we sin. God is not a God of favorites. Romans 2:11 shows that plainly. And as He began to show me that--as He began to show me His love for humanity--my heart no longer was angry and hateful but it was broken and sorrowful. Now please remember, if I haven't said it enough, I am not defending the men who massacred millions of people, but I want you all to see what I have seen. God's love does not change with sin. He still loves us and desires that none should perish. He extends grace to all. And it broke His heart to watch His people be senselessly murdered like that. But I can tell you something right now that makes my heart happy. For those who knew His grace and accepted His love and sacrifice, I think He took them before they had to feel the pain. I believe that all those children that died He took into His arms before their bodies could even be touched. And that same God that had grace and mercy upon His people also had to be just and fair. And I truly believe that there is punishment to come for those men even greater than what they're experiencing now. But can you imagine those Nazi's that might have later on accepted the love and grace of God? Can you imagine knowing all you did before and trying to cope with that? It truly shows the power and the persistence and the never ending love of God. The anger that I had is no longer there. Yes, it is sad. Yes, my heart is broken. But it's broken for the lost. Not just the lost lives physically but I truly break for the lives lost eternally. I don't think that I've ever felt like that about anything before. The Lord is doing a work in my heart you guys. I'm so glad that I get to share this with you.

Much Love
Abigail