The Illustrious P31

 

The other day I made brownies. Now, they weren’t just any brownies. They were those kinds of brownies that had chocolate chunks in them so that when you bit into one there was some melted chocolate? Oh and they were gluten free so when you ate them you didn’t feel AS bad. So there I was, measuring out all the proper ingredients and preparing these phenomenal brownies, when a thought crossed my mind. I thought, “I can add another notch to my P31 belt and surely there will be a man who wants this!” Now, honestly speaking, I was more thinking towards the satirical side of things but to be frank it did give me pause.

See, I went to Bible College and at Bible College being a “Proverbs 31 Woman” is either the highest form of existence for a woman or the highest form of humor. I happened to be in-between. But there were guys at Bible College that were only looking for the “Proverbs 31 Woman.” In fact, I had a guy tell me how perfect of a couple we would be if I was more of a P31. I honestly thought he was joking. So I responded as such. What followed was his long tirade of how women in our generation are just lacking what the Bible calls women to be. Now I know what you’re thinking; what’s my point? I’ll get there…just a second.

For those of you who don’t know what a “P31” is, allow me to explain. In the Bible, there is a passage of scripture in Proverbs. It is the 31^st chapter and it is—from beginning to end—a whole bunch of wonderful attributes that a righteous woman should strive for. In fact, it was a mother’s words to her son on the kind of woman he should be looking for. GREAT! I love that! I love the fact that a mother wanted the best for her son. And I love that the son sought out a woman like that. Verse ten of Proverbs 31 says, “Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.” As far as standards go, I want to be that woman. I want to be that virtuous wife.

But how about we step back for a moment and gain some perspective. In those days, marriage was basically the end all, be all. The life expectancy wasn’t long and pro creation was a big deal. In those days, if you weren’t married—or you never got married—your worth diminished slightly. We know as children of a Holy God that our worth is not placed in our earthly titles. But because this mother either REALLY wanted grandchildren or was just looking out for the good of her son, she wrote about the virtuous wife.

I don’t know how many women today place a lot of their worth in whether they’re going to become a wife or a mother, but I know it’s one of the top goals in a woman’s life.

Here’s a wild and crazy thought. What if we just became those women for ourselves? What if we didn’t become a “Proverbs 31 Woman” for a man and for marriage but because our Savior asks it of us? What if we became righteous women for the Man who CREATED us to be those very women? I know it’s a bit of perspective shift, but hang in there with me for a hot minute. If we were only becoming these women so that we could find a good husband, then where are we putting our worth? Where are we putting our identity? But if I were to become one of these coveted “Proverbs 31 Women” that are so highly praised because my Jesus asked it of me, isn’t that a higher purpose? Isn’t there a deeper identity in that, alone? I’d like to think so. I really would. Because if we are only motivated by pleasing—quite literally—man, then we’re going to fail no matter how we groom ourselves or how much we carbon copy our identities.

The crazy thing is, God created us to be righteous women, yes, but He also created us to be weird, funny, a little goofy, kind of crazy, and maybe a little sarcastic…or a lot sarcastic. And honestly, I don’t know why the weird or funny or goofy or crazy or sarcastic women can’t also be P31’s; because that’s who our Maker created us to be.

I think…no…I KNOW, that we are all created to be Proverbs 31 women. But you know why we were created to be those women? So we could glorify our Creator and our Savior who gave everything just to be with us. He created us to be righteous women that would reflect His Spirit and His grace and—let’s be honest—His beauty.

I really don’t want this to be a slam on Christian guys or even a slam on marriage; because I still really hope that the Lord has that planned for me. I just don’t want the only reason we choose to become Proverbs 31 women to be that we want to look good for the man looking for a wife. I want us to choose it because it’s the very LEAST that our God deserves. And the really cool part of it all is this. When we do get married and we do have a beautiful baby girl, we can tell her the same thing. But the shift has to start somewhere. The snowball has to roll down the hill to get bigger.

So to all my beloved P31’s, I say this:

                        Let’s go make some brownies!

Love,

The P31 in Process.